10.18.2011

TOWEL UPDATE:

Good news! Dan negotiated the return of Towel from all the way from Dubai!


Apparently his opening line to Alex during negotiations was, "You do not want to go toe-to-toe in an insanity contest with Meg Rowland." I'm not entirely sure how to take that. It reminds me of the time the "right" way to slit your wrists came up at a dinner party and I was like, "Oh, I'm pretty sure you do it vertically." My friend Sarah then said, and I quote, "Yeah, I trust youYOU SEEM LIKE THE KIND OF GIRL WHO'D KNOW HOW TO KILL HERSELF." I gave her a single raise of the eyebrow and she was immediately like, "Wait...that didn't sound right. I didn't mean it like that!" But again, I don't really know how else I'm supposed to take that. At all. So in summary: my friends think I'm batshit crazy and a Venus Intuition away from suicide, but I'm glad Dan finally managed to talk some sense into Alex. Here's the deal: Friday afternoon, Alex and I will meet at Target in Columbia Heights where I will buy him a new, affordable towel. After that, we will go back to Alex's apartment—or his Fritzl cellar, as I call it—and we'll make the trade.

Nobody specified who gets final say on which towel I have to buy him, so I've decided to give Alex ten options. (Which, frankly, I think is more than generous considering I'm the victim in all of this.) He may chose from the following:

1.) The "Lanai" leopard print towel:
2.) This lovely and festive Hanukkah dishtowel:
3.) The "Peace Out" bath towel:
Of which Target.com customer "azhippiechick" says, "I purchased this for my granddaughter and she says it is far-out and groovy. The envy of all her cool friends." I mean, I'm obviously somewhat hesitant to buy him something that I'll only end up being jealous of, but hey—a deal's a deal.

4.) This moose wastebasket:
Which isn't a towel, but is nonetheless quite handsome.

5.) This Nazi towel I found on the Internet for the completely reasonable price of two-dollars:

6.) This genuinely adorable Buzz Lightyear hoodie towel:

7.) A specially embroidered Baptism towel:

(You may have to wait 2-3 weeks for that one, though...)

8.) This "Witch Parking—All others will be TOAD" towel:

I personally would go for this one, but you know me. I'm a sick pup. I've got that dark sense of humor.

9.) This uncomfortable tea towel I just found on etsy:

Because, you know, pussy hair.


10.) Or this Yoda bath towel that's perfect for the dyslexic Star Wars lover in you:

(And I know he's in there!)

So there you go, Alex! Pretty maids all in a row. Ten perfectly good, affordable towels that I'd be more than happy to buy for you. So which one's it gonna be, bud???

55 comments:

Anonymous said...

Haha!!!!

Stephanie said...

i'm so upset by the use of the Disney font on the pussy towel.

Kelly said...

MEG IS BACK!!! Loving it.

Alex - please pick the buzz lightyear hoodie. And wear it. Often.

The Genius Savant said...

I too like the "All Others will be Toad" the best. I mean, who doesn't like a play on words? Also, nice job on the Revenge of the Nerds clip.

On another, somewhat related note, is Hat getting jealous from all the attention Towel is getting? Is Evie?

Megan with no h said...

I'd take the moose wastebasket.

You might want to consider making him bring Towel to Target. You know, as a show of good faith. Otherwise he may grab the new towel and escape with both.

Reading Wolf said...

I am very excited that you will be reunited with Towel. Weird as it sounds I am imagining one of those slow motion "running to each other after being apart for so long" montages. But I still would do some nasty business to one of his pumpkins.....

Anonymous said...

That's actually not the Nazi swastika...it's the Hindu symbol of good luck. The Nazi swastika goes in the other direction...

NotablyNeurotic said...

"Because, you know, pussy hair."

Wow. It's embarrassing how loud that line made me laugh.

And I also found it odd that the font used on that towel was clearly the same font used at Disney.

LK said...

Does towel come with post hot yoga ball sweat this time?

Unknown said...

Well, very good post with informative information. I really appreciate the fact that you approach these topics from a stand point of knowledge and information. This is the first time, I visited at your site and became your fan. You are bookmarked. Please keep on posting.
residenttechnologies.com |

Unknown said...

Hello, you used to write great, but the last few posts have been kinda boring¡K I miss your great writings. Past few posts are just a little out of track! come on!
gollihur |

Unknown said...

It's very easy to find out any topic on net as compared to textbooks, as I found this article at this website. 
akelitesoftware |

Unknown said...

12 months loans bad credit are absolutely free from any kind of credit check. In general, all those who had been hesitant to apply for a bad credit loan scheme.

£1000 loans over 12 months
weekend cash advance loans

Unknown said...

Taking a 1000 pound instant payday loan is not a bad thing at all. Several people take it when they have cash shortage and they can't live without having money. For further information about loans please visit us:-
http://www.1000poundstillpaydayuk.co.uk/

Unknown said...

12 month loan direct lender uk,Marcel open his vision sweet-shop a little over a year back. His amass is the solitary one of its kind within miles, and all and sundry goes to his shop when they need to please a sweet tooth. For further information about loans please visit us:-
http://www.12monthloansdirectlendersuk.co.uk/

jenni said...

You might want to consider making him bring Towel to Target. You know, as a show of good faith. Otherwise he may grab the new towel and escape with both.
e-businesssl |

Unknown said...

Hello,I love reading through your blog, I wanted to leave a little comment to support you and wish you a good continuation. Wishing you the best of luck for all your blogging efforts. 
greenupcountyhealth.com |

Unknown said...

michael kors outlet
uggs on sale
true religion jeans
coach outlet
ralph lauren shirts
rolex outlet
michael kors handbags
tory burch outlet
toms shoes
longchamp solde
chanyuan10.18

Unknown said...

michael kors wallets for women
cheap ray bans
tiffany jewelry
michael kors outlet clearance
ray-ban sunglasses
cazal sunglasses
cheap oakley sunglasses
nike outlet store
fitflops sale clearance
coach outlet online
20170111lck

Harshita Khan said...

Amazed to be here and want to read this amazing info. Thanks for this interesting article and I would really want to say thanks for this info.
Delhi Call Girls

nunung fitri said...

Terimakasih untuk informasinya,
Semoga informasi ini bermanfaat
Obat-Alami-Diabetes-QnC-Jelly-Gamat-Ampuh
Pengobatan-Herbal-Miom-Secara-alami-Tanpa-operasi
Batas-Normal-Kadar-Gula-dalam-darah-bagi-penyakit-diabetes
Kami tunggu informasi selanjutnya!!!

nunung fitri said...

Terimakasih untuk informasinya,
Semoga informasi ini bermanfaat
Obat-Alami-Diabetes-QnC-Jelly-Gamat-Ampuh
Pengobatan-Herbal-Miom-Secara-alami-Tanpa-operasi
Batas-Normal-Kadar-Gula-dalam-darah-bagi-penyakit-diabetes
Kami tunggu informasi selanjutnya!!!

nunung fitri said...

The information is interesting and I'm glad to be able to read your article.
Penyebab-&-Obat-Sakit-Perut-Bagian-Bawah-Pada-Pria-dan-Wanita
Cara-Terbaik-Mengobati-Penyakit-Kanker
6-Bahaya-Menggunakan-Celana-Ketat-Yang-Penting-untuk-Anda
We are waiting for the latest information

Unknown said...

cheap oakley sunglasses
ralph lauren
pandora uk
fred perry polo shirts
michael kors
coach factory outlet online
yeezy shoes
air max
dansko shoes
kate spade uk
xushengda0628

Joya said...

thank you very useful information admin, and pardon me permission to share articles here may help

Obat rabun jauh
Obat tampek
Obat susah kencing

Unknown said...

Thanks for information article and blog visit my website # Fooglepackers.com

Packers and Movers in Delhi
Packers and Movers in Mumbai
Packers and Movers in Chennai
Packers and Movers in Hyderabad

Unknown said...

Thank you for the information great article and blog very nice links visit website # Foogle Packers

Packers and Movers in Pune
Packers and Movers in Gurgaon
Packers and Movers in Bangalore

Unknown said...

Thanks for information We provide best articles and reliance service get free quotes visit link:

http://cheapestpackers.co.in/packers-and-movers-delhi/
http://cheapestpackers.co.in/packers-and-movers-noida/
http://cheapestpackers.co.in/packers-and-movers-faridabad/
http://cheapestpackers.co.in/packers-and-movers-ghaziabad/
http://cheapestpackers.co.in/packers-and-movers-guwahati/

Away Packers and Movers India said...

Moving and Packing, Loading, transportation, unpacking, unloading, rearranging goods and furniture or other households take time and make it people tired. Now, we are here to remove your tiredness and tension because we have great quality services for you that provide awaypackersmovers.in you comfort and ease. Everyone wants to get the hassle-free and safe execution of removal process with no damages of goods in the transit. There are lots of professional Packers and Movers Company in India and our company is one of the best leading Away Packers and Movers Company. We provide services such as household and residential relocation, office and corporate relocation and international movements, industrial goods shifting etc. With these helpful services we commit to our customers to complete whole process from packing to loading and unloading to unpacking and rearranging.
Away Packers and Movers
Packers and Movers Chandigarh
Packers and Movers Noida
Packers and Movers Faridabad
Packers and Movers Ghaziabad
Packers and Movers Navi Mumbai
Packers and Movers Thane
Packers and Movers Guwahati
Packers and Movers Kolkata

Unknown said...

buat gerobak kayu bandung
pembuatan gerobak kayu bandung
jasa buat gerobak kayu bandung
jasa pembuat gerobak kayu bandung
bikin gerobak kayu bandung

jasa pembuatan kitchen set minimalis
harga lemari dapur minimalis murah
harga kitchen set minimalis modern
cara cepat melahirkan normal
sambal roa botol
pembuat lemari di bandung

Adnan Qhalby said...

the website you manage is very good and in my opinion this is the best wesbite Walatra Sehat Mata Softgel

Unknown said...

www0414true religion outlet store
nike factory outlet
ray ban sunglasses
ray ban sunglasses outlet
coach handbags
christian louboutin outlet
coach outlet online
ray ban sunglasses
coach outlet
cheap ray bans

cara memesan herbal qnc jelly gamat said...


I am very happy Because with the content on this blog I can add my knowledge. thanks. Do not forget to visit our website to share information about health.
cara memesan herbal QnC Jelly Gamat
cara Memesan QnC Jelly Gamat
cara membeli herbal QnC Jelly Gamat
cara membeli QnC jelly gamat
cara memesan jelly gamat QnC

cara mengobati maag kronis said...

I am very happy Because with the content on this blog I can add my knowledge. thanks. Do not forget to visit our website to share information about health.
cara mengobati sakit tulang ekor
cara mengobati gangguan pencernaan
obat Gondongan Anak


Riko JR said...

I can only express a word of thanks. Because with the content on this blog I can add knowledge I, thank has been sharing this information. Do not forget to visit our website to share information and knowledge about health.
cara mengobati pengap
cara menyembuhkan abses payudara
keunggulan walatra gamat emas kapsul
khasiat herbal walatra
khasiat jelly gamat kapsul

Riko JR said...

I can only express a word of thanks. Because with the content on this blog I can add knowledge I, thank has been sharing this information. Do not forget to visit our website to share information and knowledge about health.
obat batu ginjal
khasiat jelly gamat
pusat herbal
obat luka bakra
distributor herbal
manfaat jelly gamat
obat asam urat

Riko JR said...


Thank you for visiting, thank you for giving us the information we need, do not forget to visit our page or website to share information about health thanks.
khasiat vitamin anak
agen QnC Jelly Gamat banjarmasin
cara mengatasi radang panggul
obat infeksi saluran kemih

zzyytt said...

yeezy boost 350 v2
yeezy shoes
goyard handbags
yeezy boost
kyrie irving shoes
nike epic react flyknit
kobe 9
vans shoes
links of london
converse shoes

Genzi said...

Thank you very useful information admin, and pardon me permission to share articles here may help :

Obat perlengketan rahim
Obat kencing berdarah
Obat darah tinggi ampuh

Riko JR said...

Hopefully, sustenance will be easy and simplified in all matters :-)
OBAT LUKA BAKAR ALAMI
obat sangkadi
cara mengobati mata bintitan

Riko JR said...

I can only express a word of thanks. Because with the content on this blog I can add knowledge I, thank has been sharing this information. Do not forget to visit our website to share information and knowledge about health.
cara mengobati sakit pnggang
cara mengatasi sakit perut sebelah kiri / kanan
Hopefully, sustenance will be easy and simplified in all matters :-)
DISTRIBUTOR QNC JELLY GAMAT
obat sakit tenggorokan
obat radang lambung

QQQQQQQQQ said...

hermes belt
michael kors handbags
pure boost
yeezy
ultra boost 3.0
air max 2017
nike air force 1 low
coach outlet store
michael kors outlet
fila shoes

Unknown said...

I can only express a word of thanks. Because with the content on this blog I can add knowledge I, thank has been sharing this information. Do not forget to visit our website to share information and knowledge about health.
cara mengatasi radang panggul
obat infeksi saluran kemih
obat herbal infeksi usus
sapnudin herbal
obat pusing kliyengan
nama obat diare pada anak

QnC Jelly Gamat said...

Thank you for sharing this information. Don't forget to visit our site to share information about health | obat nyeri lutut akibat asam urat | cara menyembuhkan penyakit gudik | OBAT LUKA BAKAR ALAMI | obat kliyengan alami | cara menghentikan pendarahan haid

Riko JR said...

Hopefully with the content on this blog, I can add to my insight, thank you | Benjolan Di badan | 100% Ampuh obat pengap alami | dan manjur | Manfaat QnC Gamat Emas 100% Herbal | kepala kliyengan | vertigo / pusing | cara mengobati puru | secara alami | cara pesan QnC Jelly Gamat dengan benar

Riko JR said...

can only express a word of thanks. Because with the content on this blog I can add knowledge I, thank has been sharing this information. Do not forget to visit our website to share information and knowledge about health. |
cara menghilangkan budug |
Obat Luka Lebam |
OBAT KLIYENGAN ALAMI |
cara mengobati batuk rejan pada anak |
obat batuk bangkong

asiap said...


Good information. i like this srticle. This is the best blog.. Good luck..!!
Obat Gabak Di apotik |
obat kejang demam anak
obat gonore herbal
obat jantung berdebar
obat penyakit efilepsi

CBSE Patrachar Vidyalaya said...

Cbse patrachar vidyalaya is the most reliable distance education learning institute for open classes. Get admission details, form, fees, exam date, class schedule for class 10th and 12th. For more information, call us on 8448430548, 9811262300, 9868809500 or visit our website: www.cbsepatrachar.org/ or www.cbsepatrachardelhi.com/

Riko JR said...

Thank you for sharing a good and interesting article ...
I hope the new posts will increase and can be a very good reference.
Hopefully more success thank you very much..

sari lemon tasikmalaya
cara mengobati lentigo
obat pembersih usus kotor
cara mengobati busung air

QnC Jelly Gamat said...

I can only express a word of thanks. Because with the content on this blog I can add knowledge I, thank has been sharing this information. Do not forget to visit our website to share information and knowledge about health.
Agen qnc jelly gamat magelang
Jelly gamat jurangombo magelang

QnC Jelly Gamat said...

Thank you for sharing a good and interesting article ...
I hope the new posts will increase and can be a very good reference.
Hopefully more success thank you very much..
obat benjolan di pipi
obat luka memar herbal
obatkepala kliyengan
obat luka diabetes
obat luka operasi caesar

Cashfor Gold Silverkings Pvt. Ltd. said...

We are gold buyer in Delhi offers cash for gold. So if you are searching gold buyer near you to sell gold for cash so get maximum cash for gold by us because we are reliable and genuine gold buyer in Delhi. Get in touch with us for more information about cash for gold. Call us or visit our website: Cash for Gold

yanmaneee said...

goyard handbags
kyrie shoes
yeezy
yeezy shoes
yeezy boost
kd 12
jordans shoes
kyrie irving shoes
supreme shirt
a bathing ape

yanmaneee said...

kd shoes
supreme clothing
supreme new york
supreme clothing
kyrie 7
off white shoes
hermes handbags
kyrie 6 shoes
yeezy
golden goose sneakers

smeajough said...

f1r64z7n72 a7o65u2p57 q4m49o7m50 i6c56g9f93 v7a25w1m43 x2n85y6g92

 
Clicky Web Analytics